Thursday, March 31, 2011

Blessings.

3 good things happened today.

Submitted my Health Informatics assignment today. I knew he would love it because I personally like it alot. A kind word means alot,man! He said "it is a good website and I love the music." Happy!! one thing,glad that I'm officially done with it. Another,the website is ok and the lecturer seem to like it alot. I can see that he is amazed(kononnya). *Self-flattering* So the mark,I'm not worry la. After all,submit dy,nth can be change jor.

I cut my fringes yesterday. Yes,I cut it myself. And guess what,all my sampat friends said I look different and younger. Wahahahahahaha... *GROOL* I offer free haircut if you dare to let me cut. LOL

Last but not least,going to church for choir tonight!! Wheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

new word :
GROOL = great + cool

Count your blessing and stay happy. :)

oh ya,is losing weight consider a blessing? I guess yes for people like me! LOL

I'm happy today.

Shhhh...

If you don't ask,the answer is always no.
There are many things I want you to know, I just don't know how to say them.
I wish I'm brave enough.

Wednesday, March 30, 2011

I'm over it.

Guess what.
The problem is solved.
The video and songs in my web can play now!!!!
It happened without reason
and solved without reason also.
LOLx
Or should I say I'm just too smart. XP

The room is so creepily quiet.
Guess that is the best place to study.
A place I find PEACE.
Sigh,computer,I seriously very scared of you now.
Obsession and addiction suck,the same way.
I'm going to overcome this.
Grrrrrrrrrrrrrr....
Let go let go!!!

Haven't been eating properly these days.
I got nth to eat in fact.
Haiz.. sienz
kolo mee,laksa,kueh chap,char kueh etc etc
One more month,sabar tabah~~

Don't you love the card I made?
Life is full of different kinda emotion.
Happy,sad,surprise,naughty...
the most important is you decide your own emotion.
Letting others take control
is dangerous and the stupidest thing.
Cheer! :)

Tuesday, March 29, 2011

Blur day.

I thought today is Thursday.
cause after biochem CA maybe..
and tomorrow no class.
suddenly so free...
Seriously,I'm so lost.
I cooked myself a big pot of porridge without realizing today is Tuesday
and then I ordered rice from aunty.
So in the end,I ate ALOT!
Of course share with my roomate and Jane.
We manage to finish everything.
Mind you,wasting food is a sin. =P
And we had lotsa fun chit-chatting.
Sth wrong with Low Pei Kit today.
She must be very stress too.
Cooking and eating made me happy.
Talking also.
LOL
Jane is so sweet,
she really know how to make people happy
the way she talk is so special and different.
of course I love the way she compliment me.
hahahaha...
We shall do more makan session like this.

I learnt

Calling somebody else fat won't make you any skinnier.
Calling someone stupid doesn't make you any smarter.
All you can do in life is try to solve the problem in front of you.

-quoted mean girl-

Don't ruin other people life,it won't make you happier.

a letter from my brain.

Dear Esther Song,
No no no. Don't do stupid thing. This is not the right time to watch movie. You have to study. Hurry up!
Sincerely,
brain

COLD

Brrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr...
I feel so the very cold!!!
OMG,I'm actually shivering involuntarily.
I already balut myself like a bak chang still feel very cold.
><
This is so ridiculous.
Why aren't the adipose tissues working?
COLD COLD COLD COLD COLD COLD COLD COLD COLD COLD COLD COLD COLD COLD COLD COLD COLD COLD COLD COLD COLD COLD COLD COLD COLD COLD COLD COLD COLD COLD COLD COLD COLD COLD COLD COLD COLD COLD COLD COLD COLD COLD COLD COLD COLD COLD COLD COLD COLD COLD COLD COLD COLD COLD COLD COLD COLD COLD COLD COLD COLD COLD COLD COLD COLD COLD COLD COLD COLD COLD COLD COLD COLD COLD COLD COLD COLD COLD
COLD COLD COLD COLD COLD COLD COLD COLD COLD COLD COLD COLD COLD COLD COLD COLD COLD COLD COLD COLD COLD COLD COLD COLD COLD COLD COLD COLD

Monday, March 28, 2011

Who win?

Dad called me last night,
saying that his blood glucose level is normal.
According to him, this is because he is now eating a kind of herbal product XXX.
Quite expensive I heard.
At the same time,mum does cook some herbal tea for dad,for quite a period of time.
Natural and cheap! Mum plants them~
Both of them were actually arguing on the phone,
saying which product works.
I guess mum didn't really want to claim any credit,
but did dad really overlook something and have taken things for granted?
At last,he still said mum did a very good job in taking care of him la.
Hope mum feels better lo. :)
You two healthy and happy is what I concern.
Absolutely miss this cute couple at home.

Lesson of the story :
Realize and appreciate little thing in life.
Maybe you've been seeking,
but the most precious thing/person is just right in front of you.
Don't take things for granted.

What a pity.

Everything is just so perfect.
The videos are there
The songs are there.
but the problem is it doesn't play!!
Sigh.. I can't,
I failed,
I unable to...
All this happened without a proper reason.
WHY???? I don't understand!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
How frustrating.

Maybe I expect too much...

Sunday, March 27, 2011

aye aye,Sir.

I've completed the website development.
It is beyond awesome,babe. ;)
Satisfaction and happiness,
that simple
and real...

aye aye,Sir.

8.32/10

You don't have to study when you don't want to.
Dealing with emotion is much tricky.
Sometimes,it's good to have a packed schedule.
Because you don't have to think what to do next.
Things just fall in place.
In fact,we're just rushing thru everything.
Despite willing or not,
it eventually avoid further thinking.
Just do it
Everything has to be done,
Everything is so last minute.
Step by step,
go get em

I WILL SURVIVE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
right? =P

说难过不是真的难过

尽力而为,我更加信仰量力而为
凡事坚持,我更加信仰不要勉强
人,会在某个点,某个时候
脆弱。。。

Friday, March 25, 2011

Do this in memory of me

Was so absorbed to the lyrics
Jesus touched me this morning.
In a very miracle way.
Hard to describe kinda feeling.
Especially singing this song.
Do This In Memory of Me.

I am the bread of life;
all who believe in me will have eternal life.
I am the bread of life
come down from heaven
so that all who eat this bread
will never die.

Take the living bread of life,
take the cup of sacrifice;
do this in memory of me.
Take the body and the blood,
given freely out of love;
do this in memory of me;
do this in memory of me.

I am the bread of life;
whoever comes to me will not hunger again.
I am the bread of life;
no one can come to me unless the Father draws them
near to him.

Amen, I say to you,
unless you eat the flesh
of the Son of Man and drink his blood,
you shall not have life.
All who will eat my flesh and drink
my blood will have eternal life,
and I will raise them up again.

How often we remember you,Lord?
You who have been knocking,
How many of us actually respond and open our hearts?
Being able to go to church and receive you,
How lucky and fortunate are we?
Who am I,to have You as my saviour?
Thus it hurts me when people don't go to church.
Why?

谁在乎

就让周杰伦的歌,带我到回忆里徘徊。
无法抽离,我很痛
低头,泪水已模糊视线
心,很痛很痛
只怪自己不小心,没有把心保护好
又让你受伤了,对不起。。。

Thursday, March 24, 2011

Real

OSCE
(objective structured clinical examination)
TODAY!!!!!!

I'm nervous and restless...

Wednesday, March 23, 2011

Vain

No money to cut hair. T^T

Halo,this is my noob look.

Apparently I have presentation today. Being a good and obedient girl,I listened to my lecturer advice and wore baju kurung. However,my group didn't get to present because not enough time. STupid~ have to do it next week. Haizzz.. Time wasted to prepare myself physically and mentally.

ps : I wish I'm pretty......
I actually wrote alot of things but didn't post it.
Thanks to auto save,now all the feeling comes back.
It's like a tape-playing when I read thru all the line I've written.
the heart-broken,the happiness,the worries....
Does God keep a record on my life this way also?
One day when I die,will He replay all my living without any miss?
I bet I'll get to see all the good and bad thing I've done...
I should do more good thing now.
keep my life report card clean and blue.
:)

Monday, March 21, 2011

Thank you. :)

You're just a kid.
You need no discipline.
You need to be encouraged.
Peaceful with you,you said.
Good to hear from you again.
You know how much it mean to me?
I'm moved and touched.
I become very sensitive especially since I come to this place.
A touch on my shoulder or a smile can easily cheer me up.
Because in this place,all these seem to be so precious and priceless.
Not everyone afford to give,maybe because all of us are busy,tired,unhappy,the same?....

Thanks for calling.
I'll stay strong.
Promised.
I'm gonna give you a big hug when I go back,
to prove that I never changed.

MEGA MAC!!!!!!!!!

Ulala~~~
The heavenly food is back!!!!
What an uplifting news once I opened the newspaper.
OMG,I'm so excited and desperate till I make this my wallpaper.
Control,Esther Song,CONTROL...
=DD
I MUST VISIT MCD AS SOON AS POSSIBLE!!!
Where's my kaki McD?

Sunday, March 20, 2011

Close your eye for a moment

Ever wondered why we
pray,
make a wish,
dream,
kiss
with our eyes closed?

Because the most beautiful thing is not seen by the eyes,
but feel with your heart.

Inspiration

1. This moment will nap, you will have a dream; But this moment study, you will interpret a dream.

2. I leave uncultivated today, was precisely yesterday perishes tomorrow which person of the body implored.

3. Thought is already is late, exactly is the earliest time.

4. Not matter of the today will drag tomorrow.

5. Time the study pain is temporary, has not learned the pain is life-long.

6. Studies this matter, lacks the time, but is lacks diligently.

7. Perhaps happiness does not arrange the position, but succeeds must arrange the position.

8. The study certainly is not the life complete. But, since continually life part of – studies also is unable to conquer, what but also can make?

9. Please enjoy the pain which is unable to avoid.

10. Only has compared to the others early, diligently diligently, can feel the successful taste.

11. Nobody can casually succeed, it comes from the thorough self-control and the will.

12. The time is passing.

13. Now drips the saliva, will become tomorrow the tear.

14. The dog equally study, the gentleman equally plays.

15. Today does not walk, will have to run tomorrow.

16. The investment future person will be, will be loyal to the reality person.

17. The education level represents the income.

18. One day, has not been able again to come.

19. Even if the present, the match does not stop changes the page.

20. Has not been difficult, then does not have attains

-quoted Harvard Library-

destruction

It's a bad and torturous day.
I need to deal with my jealousy.
It will get better,I hope.
It will...

Saturday, March 19, 2011

Wish comes true. xD




I'm lovin it.

Insomnia

Couldn't sleep last night.
Don't know is it because I nap too much or what.
I still insisted there's something happen back in my home.
so I texted my dad,ask him to go home and drive safely.
he replied "Why? I didn't even go out."

Should I tell him I'm worried?
Should I tell him I'm paranoid?
Should I tell him I'm afraid?

Hmmmmm....

Nvm,just an incident.
But I think I'll be interrogated soon.
><

Friday, March 18, 2011

Bruise Song

Bruise is my symbol.
I have more than just one.
Fall down,knock here knock there...
Sigh...

Just realized I was very well protected last time.
Mum mopped floor,washed the toilet
also would remind me for a million times to make sure I walk properly.

Be more careful lo.
Like it or not
Here no people jaga me la
Must take care of myself.
:\

Wahahahahahhaa...
dad said I'm a big sweet potato
thank you,I know I'm sweet.
LOL
大番薯?

:)

I love Fr's butterfly story this morning.
Sometimes, our help and sympathy makes thing worst and complicated.
In order to grow up, necessary pain is needed.
What if I don't want to grow up? XP

In this season of Lent,what are you seeking for?
Self dignity? Love? Fasting? What?
Real self...
Reflection

start from looking in when all the outer world put you down.
The Lord that lies within you,is going to strengthen everyone who believe Him.
Mercy and love are freely given,
if you open your heart..

Thursday, March 17, 2011

The least I ask for.

Don't pinch me,I get bruise easily!
Don't pull my hair,they are pathetically little and weak!
If you call yourself my friend,respect me and don't take what I said for granted.
I have my limit.
My back doesn't have a voicemail,speak in front of me.
Otherwise, stay away from me.
Don't be a jerk and spread outrageous rumor.
This is not funny.
Get a life.

At the edge...

I used to keep short hair before this
because I dislike people pulling my hair.
I should forgive her,she doesn't know I don't like it.
I can,slowly...
I want to but I need time.
Why did I give such big reaction?
Honestly, it ruined my mood.
Probably I'm tired dy
physically,emotionally,psychologically
everything...

Wednesday, March 16, 2011

You can't imagine what I'm undergoing.

me : nausea, headache and abdominal pain....
friends : pregnant?
me : I'm menstruating.
friends : .........
me : miscarriage maybe!?

ngak ngak ngak~
...........................................................................

I'm having all the menstrual symptom. >"<
Ahbuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu

Tuesday, March 15, 2011

A phone call

Didn't get to say what I was supposed to say yet!!
However,at least tonight won't be a sleepless night.
take care. :)

I wanted to say : I hope you don't find me annoying because whatever I do,I do it because I care. :)

oh my..

Forgot today is Tuesday.
Consequence : Dinner TWICE
Outcome : Full and fattening!
Solution : Two rounds of jogging track!

Even and peaceful match.

My final exam ends at 26th April,4:15pm sharp!
Hooray!!!

Frustration

Those non-science subjects kill me.
Actually both kinds do.
different way.
It's just that I don't know which language to use when doing my assignment.
Conduct in BM,lecture note in BM.
Sources in English.
Presentation in English.
How to translate those theories and concept from BM to English?
Oh God,have mercy.

Google translate can be quite funny sometimes.
Frustration piles up.
Pulling all nighters
borrowing tomorrow time
and the cycle goes on and on everyday.

Monday, March 14, 2011

why?
:(((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((
She is here.
Once a month.
Here comes my mood swing.

Irritated by a friend this morning.
Nagging... I named it.
I starred at her and that shut her mouth.
Does my eye whisper mind your own business?
Phew.. Peaceful with you,buddy.
I'm not in good mood.
And don't ask me to smile when I don't feel like.
I don't know how to fake it anymore.
Or put it this way,I don't want.
Happy also a day,not happy also one..
Then unhappy lo.

However,CA result cheer me up a bit.
Just a bit.
So I'm balance now.
Neutral point. ding dong ding dong...
you got it.
Yeah..

I just don't like the troublesome it brings.
and of course a reason to be lazy.
It's tiring,seriously.

Another awesome thing,
Lost 2 kg in 2 weeks.
Cool enough.
Eat to celebrate.
Woops.
Fatty,trim your waistline,
improve your health
No dinner for you tonight. :)
Yerrr...

Another interesting thing...
Her waistline is same as hers.
Fuiyo, don't judge the book by its cover.
but she looks so tiny.
This shows that..
Eyes give you false information,sometimes.
LOL
Lesson of the day :
The one who speaks in front grab the attention.
Those who work behind,you're just nobody.

Sunday, March 13, 2011

Interesting day

Urgh,you make me sound so stupid
Why can't you tell me your name?
Other people were like who are you looking for?
I go speechless...
interesting people in usmkk
><

Btw,I go and photocopy my note,
guess what.
the akak not only has a sweet smile
She draw a smiley on my notes.
another interesting people in usmkk
Yeah,kind action like this make my day.
:)

Chrysanthemum tea?
I thought she's the one who need that the most.
hahaha..
interesting..

Most marvelous thing is that,
I got my paid for WUS.
Not much..
=D
who don't love money?
LOL

People have been kind to me these few days,
green bean soup,banana... all sort of gifts
Even the weather is good today
so that I can do my laundry.

Again,please don't let good luck sneak away so fast.
I need them. :)

The Lord has blessed you,so that you can be a blessing to others.

cold shoulder

Am I doing the right thing?
I don't know.

Saturday, March 12, 2011

Alone but not lonely this time.

Simple dinner for simple person.
no company,
no pet,no conversation
no creature named human with me,
No,nothing...

Study myself,
Eating myself,
Sing to myself,
Talk to myself,
Look at myself,
Laugh at myself.

One day,when I'm courageous enough,
I wanna go travelling myself,
at least once...

:)

Loneliness doesn't matter who's around you.
you might be in the midst of crowd,
yet still feel lonely.
What matters is your heart.

OSCE

Wow,I love it.
It makes my heart beats real fast
at the same time,I was able to think.
Was very alert and conscious.
Rare experience.
Getting better.
:)

Don't be nervous,don't be panic...
Steady steady...

Thursday, March 10, 2011

Today.

I feel so bahagia.
Ate porridge cooked by pei kit.
If she cabut gigi everyday then good lo.
I can eat..
haha.. just kidding
get well soon,rommie.
:D
Home-cooked one is still the best.

I bought oranges.
cheap and they are sweet!
Wanted to buy banana.
but there are still apples on the shelf
now,plus oranges.
I want a large variety of fruits!!!!
but can't..
so just buy it next time then.

my ankle actually hurts frequently
these days because of the weather
especially at night.
=\

Time creeps off!!
Urgh,wait for me!

Wednesday, March 9, 2011

random

If you don't know what to say,just keep quiet.
Sometimes,silence speaks a million thoughts.
Leave some space.

People change,including me of course
The earth is moving every single seconds
Changes are unavoidable
Change to adapt
Adapt to survive

No one can take away my past,
my past determines who I am today,
my changes define who I will be tomorrow.

Yeah,maybe I've changed.
Well, that doesn't explain anything.

Monday, March 7, 2011

WARNING

And the lizards (note the plural) were playing police and thief in my room. ><
they were chasing one another.
probably there are more in my room.
mama mia~~
Once I saw it behind the curtain,I took my note ring,open it out,and darted them from far.
The wall is just behind my bed.
what if they come to my bed at night?
>0<
Urgh... and it annoyed me,when I heard the sound tsk tsk tsk...

I HATE YOU,DON'T EVER LET ME SEE YOU AROUND!
I'll seriously kill you.

我容许你走进我的生活,并没有容许你走进走出

我把你的简讯删除了
我把你的电话也删除了
这一切早就该结束。

和你的经历也决定了
把它们深锁在记忆里
你不会发现我再提起
也不会再念着旧情找你

在这段友情里,
我累了
扮演着这角色
我不配

你的冷漠,绝情,敷衍
我已不想去追究
我会慢慢得疗伤
不去听你的消息
忘记不需要努力
我需要的是时间
和你的配合
别再来缭乱我的日子了

如果那天我背叛了自己
背叛了自尊
我不会原谅自己的
不过有些事情不是说放下就可以的
但看看身边有太多关心我的人了
少了你,也许我会更自由
你不须无心伤害,
我也不须委曲求全
对你,对我都好

这一切都不重要了
我的自尊原本就没有价值
但是有生之年,
我再也不容许任何人践踏

你要好好的
因为我比任何人都希望
你,幸福。。

Sunday, March 6, 2011

死亡让人平等

不知道怎样形容这种感觉
可是我了解这种感觉
生老病死,没有人可以免去一项
希望去世的,可以安息。
留下的,要坚强。

耶稣说 : 在 我 父 的 家 里 有 许 多 住 处 ; 若 是 没 有 , 我 就 早 已 告 诉 你 们 了 。 我 去 原 是 为 你 们 预 备 地 方 去 。

要有信德。

不知道

去不去爬山,去不去爬山,去不去爬山,去不去爬山,去不去爬山,去不去爬山,去不去爬山,去不去爬山,去不去爬山,去不去爬山,去不去爬山,去不去爬山,去不去爬山,去不去爬山,去不去爬山,去不去爬山,去不去爬山,去不去爬山,去不去爬山,去不去爬山,去不去爬山,去不去爬山,去不去爬山,去不去爬山,去不去爬山,去不去爬山,去不去爬山,去不去爬山,去不去爬山,去不去爬山,去不去爬山,去不去爬山,去不去爬山,去不去爬山,去不去爬山,去不去爬山,去不去爬山,去不去爬山,去不去爬山,去不去爬山,去不去爬山,去不去爬山,去不去爬山,去不去爬山,去不去爬山,去不去爬山,去不去爬山,去不去爬山,去不去爬山,去不去爬山,去不去爬山,去不去爬山,去不去爬山,去不去爬山,去不去爬山,去不去爬山,去不去爬山,去不去爬山,去不去爬山,去不去爬山,去不去爬山,去不去爬山,去不去爬山,去不去爬山,去不去爬山,去不去爬山,去不去爬山,去不去爬山,去不去爬山,去不去爬山,去不去爬山,去不去爬山,去不去爬山,去不去爬山,去不去爬山,去不去爬山,去不去爬山,去不去爬山,去不去爬山,去不去爬山,去不去爬山,去不去爬山,去不去爬山,去不去爬山,去不去爬山,去不去爬山,去不去爬山,好叻?

Saturday, March 5, 2011

Nothing

but a hypocrite.
How long have I been tolerating this kinda people?
Shame on you.

but a inconsiderate roomates
How long can I keep quiet?
Sorry no cure

but being forgotten
How long can I bear?
In fact,I have no choice.

but a broken heart
How long it has been scarred?
Doesn't seem to heal that soon.

Back to the place called home.
So that I won't feel like a nobody here.

:))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))


Borrowed this cutie from senior.
Why is it cute?
Look at the size.
Probably my tupperware is bigger than it.
Cooking time.
Porridge! created by me.
Priceless.
Almost done!
God knows how much I like celery!
=D
With pork floss.
There you go.
My heart warming lunch.

Best way to pamper myself.
I'm thankful.
:)

Friday, March 4, 2011

Thank You,Lord.

Peace I leave with you. My peace I give to you, not as the world gives do I give to you. Let not your heart be troubled, neither let it be afraid.
John 14:27

God sends friends to support. Most importantly,God sends Holy Spirit to guide and strengthen.

Thank You,Jesus for You've spoken to me thru my friends and the bible. :)

Thursday, March 3, 2011

Pek Chek

I feel SUCKY!!!!!!!!
ARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR...
I want to scream
I want to shout
I want to cry
I want to smash
I want to RUN AWAY FROM ALL THIS !$#^%@&^&#$#@! thing!
I disgusted myself.
Oh stressed out!
Sorry,I hate myself again.

Reminder.

whatever you do,
wherever you go,
whoever you deal with,
remember
remember who you are.

Wednesday, March 2, 2011

I scored quite lousy for CA.
But don't know why,
I still manage to smile.
Proven,a smile can hide so much.
And he's right.
It's not a live death matter.
Leave it then.
Work harder for next paper.

Tuesday, March 1, 2011

Esther needs the Lord

Sometimes it hurts,
that I can't do anything,
to ease your pain.
and I don't blame you,
for not pretending anymore.
Self pity will crush you one day.
You can be mopey,you can be decadent
but if you don't want to help yourself,
no one can help you.

Do you know how much I wish to see
you can be stronger and take care of the family
while I'm not around.
Only if you know...

Another incident today.
I was asking Ms A whether she wants to join us for senior farewell party,
She just throw me a sentence
: I'm busy.
She has not gone to church for quite some time too.
are you that busy?
maybe I shouldn't interfere so much.
Ya,going to church is an option.
Some people even go to church,the heart also not there.
Maybe I should lift it to God.

I only know one thing,
my strength comes from God.
That's why I need the Lord.
and I'm sure my sister need Him too.
How to make these people realize leh??

I should be studying hoh?
Hmmmmmmmmmmm..
Just think of this.